how to be successful at online dating – 7 online dating tips for success

hi guys welcome back to my channel in this video we're going to be talking about online dating and I'll be giving you seven tips on how to have a successful online dating experience so in my previous video where I talked about how I met my Norwegianboyfriend I mentioned that we met online a lot of you were interested in knowing which dating sites are used and all of that good stuff I will address that in another video but there's one comment that particularly stood out it was a lady who say that she had a lot of trouble meeting serious men and she said most of the men who she met asked for nudes and all that you know we're a bit lewd and I, you know I had to really prior to answering I had to really ask myself okay how can I answer this because this is something I hear a lot from so many women you know and so I did a bit of research about it and I used some of the tips that I generally go by to figure out how to reply so I thought I would make this video and response to that comment Tthe first tip that I have is to pay particular attention to the profile picture that you put a lot of women put a profile picture which they think is really good really sexy and they tend to draw the wrong types of people so I think if you're going to put a profile picture don't put your boobs out that is the first thing you can dress in a bit of a sexy manner but sexy doesn't mean that you have to display all of the goodies out and I really really think that you should put a picture where you don't have extremely heavy makeup or you don't have extremely tight clothes you know you can show your assets without it being overkill , number two I would say it's always good to put a few pictures of yourself you know I think the best the best thing that you could do is to put five or six photos put a lot of pictures so that the people can see that you are the same person you are who you are I think you should put a picture doing one of your hobbies that is actually really nice especially if you mention it in your profile if you say oh I like horse riding I think it's great to post a picture of you actually riding a horse and another picture that I definitely think somebody should put is a picture of you of a full-body picture so that they get to see what you look like I've heard of so many stories and I've been a victim myself of people who look good like in their head shot and they don't tell you what is under you know like you donate you don't know they're really fat or really skinny or whatever it is and then you go to meet the person a person who say they're athletic you know they're like oh I'm super athletic I do sports every single day and you're gonna meet them and this person is not looking at all like what they say they look like so I think it's very important to do that and it's very important to put a nice head picture a nice portrait picture nothing too fancy but you know what ? you'll be very surprised to know that people don't pay as much attention to that portrait picture as the full body picture, a lot of men are visual and a lot of men care more about your body your shape than what your face looks like surprisingly the third tip is to be very precise and very straight about what you want whether you write it in your profile or in your communication with a person I found that oftentimes a lot of women are not direct and not precise about what they want you know when you start talking with a man and a man is like so what are you looking for if you're looking for a serious relationship don't just tell them oh I just want to look around I just want to see what I can get that definitely tells the guy this girl doesn't know what she wants and I want to get laid today I want to get laid soon so I could just you know pretend that I want what she wants because she's not very precise and bing-bam-boom and the guy as soon as you sleep with him they will be out of the door so you have to be very careful about that I'm sorry if you hear screaming that is my baby and I I just I've never really understood why women are not very precise when it comes to that another thing I saw this from Steve Harvey another tip I stole from Steve Harvey is he says never tell a guy exactly what it is you're looking for in a guy you know for I mean tell me what exactly you want I don't say oh I want chocolates I want the guy to bring me coffee every single day stuff like that no give him the qualities that she's sick for in a man or if it's a man if you're a man give her the polishes that you say for any women you know I want somebody who's affectionate I want somebody who's serious I want somebody who's financially stable I want somebody who's emotionally stable you can surprised how many emotionally unstable people are out there and are just waiting to pounce on you and make you the next victim especially online you know there are a lot of psychos out there have to be careful never send a nude picture or any lewd pictures to anyone you are not acquainted to or anyone that you actually haven't established a relationship with heck I wouldn't even send it to anybody I have a relationship with if you want to see me naked you have to come over you know I think that and honest that I've actually had a few people who've told me about oh I met this really great guy but he wants me to send him news before we meet and I'm like why would he want to see you naked before you meet it makes absolutely no sense if he is as serious as it says he is and if you have the kind of guy who's asking you for that trust me he just wants to waste your time never do that another thing is that you might end up on youporn or you whatever you know all these porn sites you never know and or you just might wake up one day and find yourself all over Facebook and people are laughing at you you don't know what this person must do with those nudes and another thing is that you could send as many news as you want this guy will never be serious don't ever do that protect yourself another tip is don't be afraid to make the first move so many women I know are you know sitting out there they put their profile pictures put their profiles have great profiles and nobody contacts them you know they get a lot of views but nobody contacts something like what can i what am i doing why isn't anybody contacting me but the thing is are you contacting anybody yourself you have to make that first move you have you see a guy who you interested in you have to approach him if he's not approaching you you know it's not like I know it's been all depend on culture and all that but when it comes to online dating I would say you have to let all that go first off online dating is not a cultural thing so we can't be like oh and my culture women don't approach men in your culture they probably don't date men online so this is a whole other thing and you have to realize that for every guy there are more women than men generally so for every guy there's about two or three options you know if you're really as much and if this guy is a catch you are in trouble because so many other women are out there talking to him and so many other women who want their chance so you have to absolutely go at it don't be afraid to even ask the person out further for a date so once you've seen that perfect person the person that you actually want to get to know and you've read their profile you've liked a few things so you're ready to write to them don't be afraid to actually mention something that you saw in their profile something that caught your eye mentioned common interests just make sure that you show that you paid attention to them everybody loves knowing that somebody has paid attention nobody wants a generic message like hey what's up how are you or stuff like that no tell them oh I saw that you like paintballing RSO did she like suckers football we call a football I so did you like football I like it myself I don't play it but I support this is my favorite team bah bah bah bah blah and ask you know just ask something really interesting you know and always trying to ask a question in your email so that it gets the ball rolling sometimes men's men get these or women get these emails and there's absolutely no question nothing to fall back on or you don't include something interesting about yourself or you just don't show a common interest in the person's like what should I answer to this you know what I wouldn't answer they're not curious enough or something like that so have to make sure that you definitely do that the final point the final tip is to point out your qualities don't do it in the bragging way you know them like I totally cringe when I read a profile and they say oh good-looking male good-looking female no honey let me tell you you're good-looking but you can say I don't know you can say something like on weekends I like to volunteer at the charity bla bla bla bla and and the local charity it shows that you're oh this is this word English charitable I know in French we say shy time so it shows that you know you have you have a good heart you have a soft spot for people in difficulty you know just do that and I don't I don't have to explain to you precisely but just don't be don't brag but don't diminish your qualities as well so guys I've been talking for a very long time I hope that this video I hope that you like this video and this kid video gave you a bit of insight on to to what you could be doing wrong if you're having trouble with men or when men and women on dating sites are to what you could be changing you know what you could change a bit anywho it's quite late in the evening I'm getting a bit tongue-tied thank you so much for watching bye guys anyway guys I hope that you enjoyed this video I love doing this sit-down chitty-chat videos with you if you have any more video suggestions your going to see anything else please make sure to tell me to let me know in the comments and don't forget to subscribe to this channel for more videos like this I try to post as often as I can I will definitely be amping up the the post the post frequency I'll be posting every single day from Thursday that I'm giving myself two days to get my ish together and I will be posting every single day from Thursday I'll post all types of videos so guys keep your eyes peeled for that bye bye

Online Dating Tips For Women – 14 Essential Experience!

Online dating used to be something you whispered self-consciously to your closest friends, as if it meant you had “failed” at meeting someone the traditional way Nowadays, more and more couples are meeting each other online and the rules are being rewritten

I’ve actually enjoyed my experiences online dating, and I’m on my fourth year anniversary with someone I met online The secret, I’ve found, is mainly in your attitude and approach to online dating Here are some of my top tips, from one honest classy career girl to another! 1 Be Confident Don’t approach online dating submissively It’s scary to admit that you are “looking” for that special someone but don’t forget, your blind date is auditioning as much as you are

If you walk into your date with a genuine desire to learn about the other person, have a pleasant conversation, and have an inner confidence of what you bring to the potential partnership, you will feel a lot more comfortable meeting strangers Remember, they are probably just as nervous as you are Don’t forget you want to assess if you like them Don’t worry so much about them liking you and I promise you won’t feel as nervous 2

Don’t Drag It Out I used to let guys send me several electronic messages back and forth before meeting up in person Then I started realizing that many men are very eloquent online, but too shy or too socially awkward to really spark any chemistry in real life Once I got wise to this, I’d start to notice that the men who wrote super-long messages were often the ones most reluctant to meet me in person, as they knew that they weren’t bringing a lot of assets aside from their writing ability Then I switched to making sure the messages were shorter and after just a few messages, I would initiate asking to meet for coffee Not surprisingly, some never wrote back

Others agreed and we found out during the meeting that we didn’t have any chemistry Better to meet sooner rather than later so that the encounter doesn’t drag out and you waste time writing back and forth Why would you invest time becoming emotionally attached to someone through their writing and words if you would never click once you meet in person? Establish an interest in each other and then don’t drag it out Get that initial meeting over with as soon as you can And, just as importantly, never continue dating someone after the first date because you “feel bad” for them

If they persist, be honest and say, “I had a great time, but I don’t see us together romantically” You need to cut those strings loose immediately Nothing good can come of this situation, not to mention you’re now bringing in a drain on your time and energy 3 Have a Sense of Humor Attitude is everything

I kept a brief blog during two periods of online dating in two different states It was the only way to keep everything in perspective and to keep my friends entertained I would post the messages I would receive online (some of which led me to blocking the writers) or comment on weird dates I’d been on Most notable: the guy who was obsessed with turtles, and the guy who wanted to talk about his nightmares Here’s a tip: If a guy has to write “no crazies please” in his profile, you do not want to hang out with him since clearly he is a magnet for drama

You WILL go out on a weird date at least once, but probably more than once That’s why I recommend coffee or something non-committal – you don’t want to be stuck at a dinner table! You need to prepare yourself for it now and instead of turning this into a pity-party (“Why do I always get the weirdos”) you need to change your attitude to, “I can’t wait to tell my friends about this!” 4 Know Yourself Before Demanding Attributes From Others Make sure you’re not asking for more than you’re willing to give Are you writing that you want someone in a certain socioeconomic status, but in the same paragraph you demonstrate a lack of ambition and a lack of discipline? It’s difficult to demand standards from others if you don’t have them for yourself Don’t gleefully write “I’m a princess and you must open the door for me and you will take me out to a five-star restaurant on our first date,” and then wonder why confident men steer away from you

The classiest thing a lady can do is simply expect high standards, not demand them It’s amazing how much this makes a difference in people’s opinion of you Consider asking a trusted friend (perhaps even a male friend) to check your online profile and see if they can guess the type of person you’re trying to attract If they can’t, you might want to consider rewriting your profile or changing your photos so that there isn’t a disconnect between what you think you’re saying and what you’re presenting to the world 5

Never Lie On Your Profile Do not put up photos from 50 lbs ago Do not say you don’t have any kids if you really do Do not gush that you love heavy metal when you really don’t Do not say you like long walks in the park if you’re actually allergic to pollen Just don’t

6 Recognize Online Dating is Hard for Both Men and Women On many sites, some women just have to put up one photo and they will receive 100 messages in one hour This is mind-boggling Men have to work a little harder to be on the receiving end of pursuit Thus, men are dealing with online dating rejection every single day as the odds of their receiving a response are lower than yours

With 100 messages a day, how are you going to possibly sort through these? Your mind will eventually figure out shortcuts – who put effort into their profile, who has a photo you like, who used humor in their profile or who seems confident While at first it may feel flattering to get so many messages and “likes,” don’t let it go to your head Stay authentic and true to your values and your character, and use the same clues in assessing their profile that you would if you met them in real life 7 Recognize Setups If a guy reaches out to “tease” you or to challenge you (“I bet you’re the type of girl who would never…”), walk away right now

This is a huge red flag You do not have to prove anything to him Only a stranger with bad intentions would want to make you feel defensive or that you have to prove anything If someone said this to your face, how would that make you feel? Delete his message and move on Same with inappropriate or vulgar unwanted messages – don’t even bother responding with a reaction because that is what they are looking for

Block or report the person and focus on positive interactions 8 View Online Dating as a Marathon, Not a Sprint Unless you get incredibly lucky, you’re not going to hit off with the first person you meet and live happily ever after You need to be prepared for a series of interesting first dates before you find yourself moving on to that one special person 9

Experiment With Different Dating Websites I’m not going to name the different dating websites as every generation seems to have a new app or favorite website, but just know that each site seems to have its individual culture in terms of demographics, emphasis on serious relationship, ways of interacting, and so forth Don’t expect to have the same results with each website, you may have to experiment a bit For instance, some are definitely a bit more marriage-oriented while others feature more casual encounters Also, I online-dated in two different states (I changed jobs), and although I was using the same website I found the quality of men and the experience to be quite different on that same website Give certain sites a second chance if you move to a new city, or ask your friends what they’ve used that they like

10 Don’t Take Mismatches Personally Some women may come home after every coffee date and sulk on the couch “I’ll never meet anyone!” When you bring this attitude to the table, you bring negativity and bad energy to the process and you are also putting on a desperate vibe, which means you will not attract the best candidates Once you start complaining about your dates, you have begun to look at dating as a combative and negative experience which will affect your judgment I’m telling it to you straight: Desperation is not attractive

Be classy, acknowledge that not everyone has chemistry with each other, “bless and release,” and move on to the next date 11 Take a Break During my first online dating foray, I thought I had it down Then I scheduled three coffee meetups…in the same day This was as exhausting as it sounds

Looking back on it, this wasn’t the smartest move for an introvert anyway, but having three different blind dates on the same day made me realize I wanted to take a step back and not be out there so much Step back and take a break every so often – often you can temporarily disable your profile so that you don’t continue to get messages in your absence 12 Be Safe I never let anyone pick me up at my house for a first date and I always told a friend when I was on a first date, even if it was just coffee The first time my now-boyfriend came over to my house, I texted my friend and asked her to check up on me in a few hours

It’s just always good to let people know your whereabouts when you’re hanging out with strangers 13 Be Honest About Your End Goal Be honest with yourself about what you’re looking for and make sure you’re using the appropriate website Also, you need to make sure you know what type of man you are looking for Then, if his internet profile gives even the hint of something else to the contrary, do not contact him

I repeat, do not contact him If you are looking for a significant relationship with someone who doesn’t drink, for example, do not reach out to someone who has a photo of them with a beer bottle in their hand, no matter how good looking they are You cannot change anyone and you are only setting yourself up for disappointment later Many times when people complain about mismatches during their online dating adventures, you can generally discern that there were hints of a potential mismatch from the very beginning 14

Keep an Open Mind Sometimes you have to recognize what is a “big rule” (the dealbreakers) and what is a “little rule” (you just trying to maintain control over a scary process) When I met my now-boyfriend, I actually broke most of my own smaller rules I gave him my telephone number after one message online, met up late at night for our first date, and I kissed him on the first date All things I’d refused to do for many other men who’d contacted me Four years later, he is the most inspiring, supportive, motivated, and ambitious person I know

Sometimes I even forget we met on the internet It’s fine to have ground rules as an emotional support, but as long as you’re safe and legal, don’t forget to follow your heart as well